I am so in love with you

I don't know what I wan to do now. I'm starting to wonder if I ever actually enjoying science at school or if it was just the teaching style i liked. I don't know anymore.

Argh. Why do I always end up thinking about everything all at once? Trust me to overload on a million important things all at the same time.

I know that I know you do... and I know I should always know that... But I wish I knew for certain - completely and unwaveringly... Instead of having to convince myself each day.

I hate that you can still make me feel like you're better than me

argh! This would be so much easier if I actually had any interest in the topic.

I'm beginning to wonder if it would just be easier to have a clean cut, rather than this confusion  ofnot knowing how much I can tell you about things. I don't trust you anymore and that makes me sad, but I have other people in my life who I can trust, who aren't going to judge me for what I say, and who aren't going to get all grumpy at me every week for having a bad day once in a while. A clean cut seems like it would be so much easier, but it wouldn't happen because I'd still see you every week :/