Tuesday, November 8, 2011

no one left to talk to

Person A: I can't talk to you because I feel like I'm dumping my problems on you when you've got enough of your own to deal with. Even though I have an amazing capacity to listen if you need it

Person B: I can't talk to you because its still teetering on not quite being ok yet and I don't feel comfortable telling you my issues because we'll end up back where we started

Person C: I can't talk to you because you don't actually listen. You ask something and then walk off. You send a message and then log off. You text and don't reply. So I don't know what I'm meant to do.

Person D: I can't talk to you because I feel like you have too much else going on and my problems seem trivial compared to yours

Person E: I can't talk to you because by the time i've found the words, you've stopped listening

Person F: I can't talk you you because you've changed lately. You make me feel like a little kid who should be "seen and not heard". It sucks

Person G: I can't talk to you because you seem to have gone into "pretending i don't exist" mode. I can't even ask how your course is

Person H: I can't talk to you because now you've got what you want from me, you're obviously too cool to acknowledge my existence.

Who does that leave me to talk to? No one that knows enough about me for me to feel confident enough to tell them whats going on in my head. No one who wouldn't laugh. No one who it wouldn't feel awkward telling these things.

I know the future is right around the corner and our friends will not be the same ones we made in the last 5 years, but It shouldn't be like this. I shouldn't have to hold everything in to protect everyone else

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